leaving

I have been a pastor in my current place of residence for 10 years now.  I have seen more people come and go from church than I can count.  Some people left church angry or dissatisfied.  Some people left church sad.  Some folks left church because they found something else.  Some people left church to get more rest or work or exercise or family time.  Some people left church because it wasn't interesting enough for them.  Some were just worn out.  Being the leader of a small church is challenging. Momentum waxes and wanes like the lunar calendar.  I've seen entire families come and go after a season or a year or two. Some people leave church because someone they loved died and they could not bear to be part of the Christian community again.  In the past year, I've seen people drift away from church:  People who were connected, involved, in leadership, as committed as anyone.      
People leave church. It's a common trend, well documented and publicized. We can read all the statistics and the explanations why people leave church. Books have been written about this from many perspectives.  There are generational analyses and social/ ethical claims and worship wars between the traditional/liturgical and the contemporary/evangelical.  Everyone has an answer for why people leave or don't go to church.  It's the church's problem.  Or it's a cultural phenomenon.  Or it's the wickedness of secularism. We guesstimate that only about 20% of Americans are worshiping on any given Sunday morning anymore. Patterns and lifestyles have changed.  Sunday morning is not the sacred time it once was.  But Sunday has not been replaced by some other day and time for people of Christian religious faith to gather.    
 
I'm personally tired of the analysis and the diagnoses of the problem with the irrelevant church or with the secular culture. I think we're missing something in the discussion.
 When people leave church, those who remain grieve. There is a sense of abandonment, personal failure, and even betrayal sometimes. Faithfulness has been spiritualized to the extent that faith is only about one's relationship with God. To have faith is to believe in God.  But, this narrow definition of faith has excluded important characteristics that have been observed and practiced for thousands of years. Faith is also about consistent, enduring loyalty to others. It is about constancy and steadfastness, even with people with whom one does not agree. Loyalty has been lost to consumerism and personal choice. If you don't like something, move on. We are a fickle and restless people, who cannot remain part of a thing long enough for that thing to become part of us.  The grass is always greener.  And there's always a reason to leave. 
But, the biblical witness, psalms and prophets, suggests that God's faithfulness to Israel was proved by long suffering and patient forbearance with an obstinate and rebellious people. Like a parent with a wayward child. Or a spouse with an unfaithful spouse. To be faithful is to show up, even with and for those lousy sinners. To be faithful is, according to Jesus to be abandoned by ones friends and betrayed into the hands of those who would kill you. That's love. It endures all things.
I have been here for ten years.  I'm surprised I've lasted this long.  I know pastors who have been in a place for forty.  I used to think that was too long. Now I'm not so sure.  I think it provides a countercultural witness that speaks to the enduring quality of faith.  I can't leave church. It's full of broken and messed up people. And when they leave, I grieve. Abandonment is the cross we bear. My hope is knowing that God will never abandon the church, the faithful servants of Christ in every age.