weddings?

Say you're 20 something and you haven't gone to your traditional family church in a couple of years---you've been a Christmas/Easter person. Your parents don't get you. You were raised as a "churchgoer" in a church going family. Your parents go religiously. You have never been given a relevant alternative in which to be faithful. Its always been 'church' or nothing. In or out. After so long, being out wasn't so bad. And you were busy enough living life. But something was missing.
But then, a crisis! You want to get married. In church. You believe in GOD. Maybe even in Jesus. You pray. You want to live a life that is meaningful, spiritual, and hopeful. You want to help people in your community. You have no church affiliation, but you want to be married before God and faithful Christian witnesses. You call around. You pick the Lutherans because they're sort of catholic protestants. Fewer rules, but still sacramental and generously biblical. Yet not pretentious or judgmental like some bible churches might be. But every Lutheran church, every Catholic, everyone you call gives you the old church rule: Non-members cannot be married here! Membership gives one access to a Christian practice you expected. What do you do? Do you dance and "join" in order to meet the requirements? Or do you go to the justice of the peace and get legal without the blessing of God's Word, community prayers, and the unity of the Sacrament? What do you do? Membership has its privileges. Non-membership can have painful, unexpected consequences.
Gen xers are facing this reality. Some are feeling it more seriously than others. They want to be in, but they're not connected. They are prodigal, lost. And it ain't all their fault. maybe if the church found a way to really welcome them. maybe if the church wasn;t so concerned about worship attendance and membership. Maybe if the church was concerned about daily spiritual Christian formation---how to follow Jesus on the ground, in your home and work place. maybe if an alternative community was born for these people.
What if gen xers just revolted and formed a community of believers outside of 'church', who can become church for each other. A new fellowship of believers with all of the gifts and dreams of GOD within.
I, for one, do not reject anyone who calls seeking to be married in the church. I know that it's code word, sometimes, for people of faith living outside of Christian community, seeking a way in. Sometimes its not. Sometimes its people who just want to get married with no strings. But often its people who want the strings, the community, the spirit-filled life, the hope and love of God, the Word, the sacrament, the meaningful missional life to care for the world. When it is, I want to help them be faithful!