have you found Jesus?

There are days when I am not in tune to God's presence.  I am doubtful that the invisible God is near, available, accessible, close to me. At times, Jesus is hidden from me.  Now, I am a Lutheran Christian and a Pastor.  So, the presence of God and the nearness of Christ are supposed to be something I know and proclaim. The Bible is essentially about the presence of God, the voice of God, the revelation of God to people; and finally the incarnation of God in Jesus of Nazareth.  I believe that God is present whether or not I can sense the presence of God.  BUT, I also want to experience God's presence or the visible, tangible, incarnate, in-person Jesus.  I want Jesus LIVE!  I can see why people might reject or deny the existence of God, since the presence of God is a matter of faith.  We want to believe in what is real.  What is real is what one can see, touch, smell, taste, understand with one's mind and senses.  There is a certain physicality that we require.
I go back to the Lutheran idea that God is hidden in and among those who are suffering.  Luther believed that the crucifixion of Jesus signified God's compassion for the suffering, dying, unjustly treated, impoverished children of the world.  So, if I am in search of God, I will find myself connecting with people who are troubled.  I think about this upper middle class American fundagelical megachurch Christianity that is clean and big and technologically proficient and culturally relevant.  Have you found Jesus?  This is a question that hyper-spiritualizes the gospel. And it assumes that we are the agents of salvation.  When you find Him, you will be saved.  Is God absent?  Or are we looking in the wrong space?  In what ways do we identify with suffering?  How does the biblical God become known?
Jesus is hidden from us because we are comfortable and safe.  Jesus is in the shadows, on the margins, among the overlooked and forgotten in our streets.  Jesus is with that homeless guy curled up on the sidewalk in front of the Philadelphia convention center.  I saw him on Tuesday. I'm not sure that anyone else did.
If you are in a place where God is absent from you, consider searching among the refuse.  Among the discarded and abandoned is where God can be found.  The curtain is often our own prejudice and our own false sense of security.  I trust that my eyes will see God when I am facing someone who is struggling. I doubt any of us have to look real far or too hard.

day laborers in heaven

First, the story:  Jesus told it like this.  ‘For the kingdom of heaven is like a landowner who went out early in the morning to hire laborers for his vineyard. After agreeing with the laborers for the usual daily wage, he sent them into his vineyard.When he went out about nine o’clock, he saw others standing idle in the market-place; and he said to them, “You also go into the vineyard, and I will pay you whatever is right.” So they went. When he went out again about noon and about three o’clock, he did the same. And about five o’clock he went out and found others standing around; and he said to them, “Why are you standing here idle all day?” They said to him, “Because no one has hired us.” He said to them, “You also go into the vineyard.” When evening came, the owner of the vineyard said to his manager, “Call the laborers and give them their pay, beginning with the last and then going to the first.” When those hired about five o’clock came, each of them received the usual daily wage. Now when the first came, they thought they would receive more; but each of them also received the usual daily wage. And when they received it, they grumbled against the landowner, saying, “These last worked only one hour, and you have made them equal to us who have borne the burden of the day and the scorching heat.” But he replied to one of them, “Friend, I am doing you no wrong; did you not agree with me for the usual daily wage? Take what belongs to you and go; I choose to give to this last the same as I give to you. Am I not allowed to do what I choose with what belongs to me? Or are you envious because I am generous?” So the last will be first, and the first will be last.’ 

Some story.  What does it mean?  Thing about parables is they have more than one meaning. Given the unemployment situation, one can read all kinds of labor issues into this parable.  Unfair labor practices lead to unionization of workers.  Or is this landowner a socialist?  Distributing wealth indiscriminately, and deincentivizing workers.  If you can, hang around until 5:00 pm and you’ll still get paid the same as those guys who worked all day—pretty sweet deal if you’re on that end of the labor pay equation.  Thing about parables is: They mean something different to different people, partly because of the characters with whom you may identify.  Are you more like that landowner or more like that day laborer or more like a vineyard?  I can take a stab at what it means, though. I hear something like this:   Heaven is open.  Anyone can get in.  God invites us.  Jews, gentiles, pagans, prosperous 21st century Americans.  Heaven is not a reward for a life well-lived.  It is not an inheritance for deserving heirs.  It is not a final blessing for God’s holy people.  It is not an incentive to inspire good behavior and healthy choices.  Heaven is communion with God which can happen in a single moment or throughout a lifetime of faithful endurance. There are people who will never set foot in church, never recite a creed or pray the Lord’s prayer.  They may not be baptized, communing, and contributing members.  They may not have memorized a single bible verse. But if they have communed with God, the kingdom of heaven belongs to them.   It’s not about what you do or how well or how often you do it.  It’s not first about your response, your worship life, your prayer life, your devotion or even your heart.   God is the agent of grace who welcomes, invites, calls, and comes to us.  Thus, Christianity---if it is the way of Jesus—is not a religious system or a human institution.  It is God’s initiative. We are recipients, God is the giver. You might ask, but how does one commune with God and not pray, worship, serve, etc…? That is a good question.  And the answer may be:  there is no way to commune with God and not worship, pray to, and become a servant to God.  They are the natural, innate responses of creature to creator, of the rescued to their savior. Back to the parable: 

forgive.

Can you think of someone you once cared about, maybe even loved, with whom you are no longer speaking because of something said or done, or because of some failure on someone’s part? Is it a family member?  An ex-spouse? A friend?  An acquaintance?  Sometime we have to move on, beyond guilt or resentment.  Relationships end and sometimes badly. If any of you have experienced the sadness of broken relationships or the pain of conflict within a group of people, then you understand the seriousness of the passage from Matthew 18.  Division, conflict, and disagreement seems to be the name of the game in our political system.  A new tv series airs this fall called “revenge” and one of the commercials has a character, who has been wronged, declare that they are not out to forgive.  We contrast attitudes of vengeance that often show up in talk about “so and so getting what’s coming to them; a “they’ll get there’s” kind of response to mistreatment; with the attitude described in Don Kraybill’s book about the victims of the Nickel Mines shooting.  There was national attention drawn to the behavior of the Amish community’s response to the crime.  Forgiveness was part of the healing and grieving process.  They were, it seemed, legally bound to forgive because of their allegiance to Christ. But they were treated as superhumans because of their capacity to forgive.  Is that who we are now? Incapable of reconciliation with those who do us wrong?  Are we back to an eye for an eye pod world? Only the radically religious Amish are able to muster the power to forgive?     

fall clothes

Fall is beautiful, may be my favorite season.  The colors of decay, the warm oranges and pinks of late afternoon suns, the bright October moon, harvest time.  We picked apples at an orchard in NY last week.  Drank freshly pressed cider, ate warm apple cider donuts. Farming was always fun in the fall—driving hay rides out to our pumpkin patch, watching the kids pick out their pumpkin.  Football is back.  Baseball has ended, apparently for the season, since the Phillies lost this week.  I guess there will be more baseball, maybe even a world series, but not here. I love fall clothes; sweat shirts and jeans.  I have these two new heavy flannel shirts.  

The only thing I don’t love about fall is when I have to lug all of the plastic totes and hangers out of the attic and basement to switch over warm weather clothes to cold weather clothes.  I guess if we had larger closets we wouldn’t have to do this, but we don’t.  So we break out the bins of sweaters and turtle necks, jackets, and gloves.  It’s a project that my wife largely undertakes on behalf of herself and the three boys.  I’m not trustworthy in that department.  Ot sure if that shirt belongs to Luke yet, or Jonah, if those pants fit Luke or Elijah.  Luke’s the middle man—inheritor of Jonah’s clothes, giver of Eli’s clothes. Trouble happens when Eli grows into Luke’s clothes before Luke grows into Jonah’s. Nevermind, the constant need to clothe the eldest with new clothes as he outgrows the old.  He doesn’t really have a fall/winter bucket.  But he’ll need fall/winter clothes.  As for me, I keep my transfer clthig down toa single bucket. If it doesn’t fit, its gone.   So, next week, I will part with some summer shirts.  And I will likely cast off some fall/winter clothes that don’t fit anymore.  Not growing up, but getting bigger has an effect one’s clothes. We are changing over clothes at Peter’s Porch in an effort to provide appropriate clothes for the coming cold season.  We will get rid of all of the summer clothes, trusting that we will receive a supply to be ready for the spring and summer.       

This becomes donation time, too.  Rooting out old clothes or clothes that are tattered or worn. Mending of clothing is not as popular as donating and buying new.  We receive donations here that have tags on them and things that seem barely worn; and we receive clothes in poor condition that we do not keep.  I don’t typically hang on to clothes that are old or tattered—except my Susquehanna University sweatshirt that I’ve had since my senior year of High School.   It has actually been thrown out and rescued! Some clothes preserve memories.  What you were wearing on a certain occasion sticks with you.  Cherie’s wedding gown will likely never be work again.  But we will not part with it.   

God and Taxes.

A letter to the IRS

Dear Internal Revenue Service,

I am filing my 1040 here. As you will see, I made $9,600 this past year, and found that according to the 1040 form, I owe $324.44 of that to federal taxes. While I am glad to contribute money to the common good and towards things that promote life and dignity, especially for the poor and most vulnerable people among us, I am deeply concerned that 30 percent of the federal budget goes towards military spending, with $117 billion going to support the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq. (Further, when we include the 18 percent that goes towards past military costs, such as the $380 billion in debt payments, 80 percent of which are military related debts, that number goes up to a total military budget of $1,372 billion — nearly half of the federal budget). My Christian faith and my human conscience require me to respectfully reserve the right not to kill, and to refrain from contributing money towards weapons and the military.

For this reason, I am enclosing a check for $227.11, which is, according to the form, 70 percent of what I owe. The remaining $97.33 represents 30 percent of my tax payment, the amount that would go toward military spending. I will donate this remaining 30 percent to a recognized U.S. nonprofit organization working to bring peace and reconciliation.  My faith also compels me to submit to the governing authorities, which is why I am writing you respectfully and transparently here. I am glad to discuss this further if you have any questions.

May we continue to build the world we dream of,

Shane Claiborne (excerpt from Sojourners' God's Politics Blog, 4-11/2011)

There is one Christian's response to taxation in a democracy.  Thank you,Shane Claiborne, for giving us something to think about.  Jesus gives us another:  Give to the ruler what belongs to the ruler and give to God what belongs to God.   I’m sure Jesus had no money at all. He had to ask to see a coin.  For the poor who have no money, what do they owe the government who prints it?  And to give God what belongs to God is perhaps to say that everything belongs toGod for God made it.  So what does not belong to God, including the things that belong to the ruler?  Including the ruler himself, made in God’s image, created by the creator.   

Churches are exempt from paying certain taxes.  Ministers are too.  I pay taxes, though.   My meager taxes  do pay government salaries and war bills and legislation I don’t agree with. My taxes support wall street bail outs and corporate greed.  And my  taxes support state food purchasing programs that allow us to purchase $5,000 of food relief for our neighbors.  Government partners with God in the food ministry we offer here.  Not every tax dollar is corrupted. Not every tax dollar is stewarded for God’s purposes because human intervention in God’s business does not always go according to plans.  And yet, somehow even the execution of God’s Son, the Lord of heaven and earth, turns out right.  So it is okay to entrust tax dollars to the government, when we believe that God is the Lord of all.  More importantly this text (Gospel of Matthew, ch. 22:1-15)  raises the question: what belongs to God, what belongs to the governing authorities and what responsibility do I have toward them both?   In the first century world it was less complicated.  Roman imperial government and the U.S. democratic republic are not the same thing. There are similarities.  Money symbolizes and sponsors power.  Militancy and war maintain a fear-induced peace.   We need good government.  The necessity of government is up for discussion these days with different takes on that.  I think government is called to protect the vulnerable, to defend the powerless, and to create the potential for peace.   Citizens must establish government that is effective in doing these things.  When the government protects the powerful, the wealthy, and the strong, while punishing the vulnerable and the poor, Christians must respond.   Sometimes governments, both federal and state, back the wrong horse. But if Christians don’t speak out and speak for the poor, we disobey God and fail to follow Jesus.  This is not easy.  We hope that wiser people represent the welfare of all of their constituents in Harrisburg and Washington.  But so often it seems like reelections and top donors take precedence over doing what is right and fair and just.  The wealthy are getting wealthier and the poor are getting poorer in the US. This is not so in the developing world, where extreme global poverty has been significantly reduced.   This is a difficult time for the U.S. , when there is 10% unemployment and government safety net programs for lower income citizens are threatened.  Reactionary movements, like the tea party and Occupy Wall Street, embody the popular opinion that something deep within our system has to change.   An election cycle may not be enough to change the situation we are in.  2008 and 2010 do not seem to have brought the change we need.  Maybe getting the "right" man or woman in the oval office or in the congress is not the change we need.  I am not suggesting that we do not vote. I am suggesting that voting is not enough.  Maybe the change is more personal first. Maybe an equitable and sustainable economy that assures that all people have what they need for life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness requires something more of you and me.   Maybe it starts with you and me wrestling with the question:  Whose is this? Mine?  Caesars?  God’s?  What difference does that make? What priorities must shift?  What habits must be broken in order to realize the truth that Jesus spoke so simply to the wealthier powers of his day?  Give to God what belongs to God.  Start with your possessions and your heart will follow.  Amen.            

the will of God?

Which of these is doing the will of God?

A married couple,who had an extravagant and beautiful wedding, wrote and spoke vows of loving devotion to each other; but whose marriage was full of verbal and physical abuse, as well as infidelity. 

Or a couple who never marry, but they live together faithfully, adoring each other and honoring each other? 

Or how about this:

A teenager who tells his parents that he was invited to a party where there will be drinking.  His parents tell him he is not allowed to go and he tells them that he respects their decision.  On the night of the party, however, he sneaks out the window, goes to the party, and drinks with his friends.

Or a teenager who lies to his parents, tells them he is sleeping over at a friends house, but goes to the party.  After being there for an hour and drinking one beer, he realizes he doesn’t want to be there.  So he leaves, goes home, and sneaks into his room. 

The gospel of Matthew has a story in it, Jesus tells it to some religious leaders, who were questioning Jesus' authority as a teacher and healer. A man had two sons.  The father goes to his son and tells him to go into the vineyard and work.  The first one tells his father to his face that he will not go, but later has a change of heart and goes.  The second one knows the right answer and says that to his father’s face, but does not go into the vineyard to work.  Which of these obeys his father? This parable is about respect and integrity.  Respect for authority first.  It all started with a question about Jesus’ authority. Who authorized the work he was doing?  What were his credentials?  What leader gave Jesus permission to do what he was doing and say what he was saying?   Of course this question is coming from people who know the answer, an answer that threatened their own leadership and authority.  They know that Jesus would say it came from God.  And if they choose to believe that, they are submitting themselves to Jesus as God’s prophet and messiah.  If they reject his claim, they will lose the popular vote.  He had many followers.  He could lead a revolt against the temple, undermining their authority over the people.  The problem they had with Jesus was that his message and his actions were empowering and life-giving for the masses of humanity who lived on the edge of survival; his message and work gave hope to people living on the margins; outsiders, the powerless, and the poor.  This undermined the hierarchy and threatened the status of the wealthy and the powerful.  Doing that is dangerous.  Jesus was unafraid.  He did not play by their rules.  

Linda and the butterflies

It's taken me a while to return to this blog, to writing altogether.  I think I have been suffering from depression.  Not clinical depression,but spiritual depression brought on by loss, grief, and routine. Don't worry, though.  In life, these times come.  And then they pass. Call it dark night of the soul or the abyss or spiritual death---it is necessary that these things happen in order for something new to emerge.  It has taken a little time, but I am ready now to tell this story:
This is the story of how Linda and the butterflies gave us tangible evidence of things worth hoping for.  Linda died too soon.  She was diagnosed with ovarian cancer in November of 2010 and she died on September 10th. We were prepared and we were surprised.  Linda prepared us with the resilliency of a warrior.  The year was a roller coaster of crushed optimism and dashed hopes.  Mortality is sometimes brutal. Linda fought a good fight.  She trusted God to heal and to save her.  She let go of some things, even as she desperately clung to others for support and encouragement. She craved prayer and faces of those she loved.  She fought hard.  She persevered.  And she suffered so that her family might find some peace.  She told us the truth about everything.  She cried and laughed and went to the beach.  Linda was faithful.  She was a disciple, a follower and practitioner of the way of Jesus.  She was as good at it as any of us are.  She was distracted sometimes and disinterested and disillusioned.  She hoped for the church to be more than what it was. She had a vision of a church that was welcoming and vital and caring.  She was angry with the way people treated people in church.  She expected more of us.
Linda led this little congregation of Lutherans as the organizer of our global relief work.  She helped us extend ourselves beyond Akron to the larger world that God loves.  She increased our efforts 100 fold in three years, making World Hunger and World relief an integral part of our mission and ministry.
When she was dying and we knew she was dying I asked Linda what we should do for Lutheran World Relief this year. I also asked her what we might do in worship on 9/11 to commemorate the 10th anniversary of the terrorist attacks.  Linda was creative and understood the power of aesthetics, the importance of creating space for the Spirit to work.  She said that we ought to assemble the Lutheran World Relief personal care kits on that day as a sign of compassion for suffering people around the world. Then she said we should release monarch butterflies as a sign of resurrection hope.  I had no idea how we were going to do that.  But her son and grandson did. Linda was a gardener who loved native perennials that attracted songbirds and monarchs.  So they collected monarch larvae, built them a habitat, and watched them transform into monarchs.  Linda was so sick in the last 14 days, we prayed she would die for peace sake.  She waited.  Or God did.  I don't know how it works.  But she died on September 10th, knowing that we would release butterflies and pack kits the next morning.

being faithful is weird

Being faithful is weird. As a person trying to be faithful, I can attest to this honestly. It is weird because I am committed to a certain way of seeing and understanding life.  It is a way that has historical longevity.  But it is also a little absurd.  I am uncertain about these things.  Contrary to a lot of evidence, some of us believe in an invisible power who is responsible for everything. Being faithful to God means to recognize God's presence in the world. In the face of serious doubts.  

It is not the same as one who acknowledges God's existence.You can believe in God and not notice that God is here.  

Some of us claim that this invisible power, God, is personally knowable. This thought is embedded in the ancient writings of a near middle easterno nomadic tribal group called the Hebrews.  This writing became the bible.  It claims that:

God is not far away or inaccessible to you. God is near. God sees and hears you at all times. God is with you right now.  

God also speaks.  This is a biblical innovation by the Jewish people. God speaks to people; individuals and groups.

God has spoken in ages past through the ancient prophets. Now God speaks to us through His Son, Jesus.

Jesus of Nazareth is God's message to the world. In the New Testament, Jesus' story is shared with the world.

We can access God, the source and meaning of life, through Jesus. This biblical innovation came from the Jews in first century Palestine, who long awaited a Messiah: a Savior and King.  They got one.  And most did not recognize him.  But some did.  They became known as disciples of Jesus, followers of the way, or Christians.

Kira

Ordinary time.  That's what the church calls the time after Pentecost.  Ordinary time.  After the miracle of miracles, the resurrection of the Son of God, an extraordinary thing happens to a paralyzed group of scaredy cat disciples behind closed doors on the streets of first century Jerusalem. They become multi-lingual, articulate, and radically extroverted.  A small group of uneducated, ethnic hicks take on the world with their message of salvation. They can't help but share the extraordinary story and the implications and meaning behind it, not only for themselves but for the entire world--the cosmos.  Silent, fearful, eyewitnesses become demonstrative, powerful spokespeople for a movement that dares to usher in an age of forgiveness, generosity, mercy, and hope.  We call the time after that, ordinary.  And it is.  Ordinary, yet soaked in anticipation of what is yet to come.  What they saw and heard and said and did was only the beginning.  The story continues in ordinary time; in our ordinary times.  
An ordinary and familiar story:  She is a recent college graduate without a job, living at home in Ephrata, Pennsylvania.  She is in transition., in limbo.  Not yet fully realizing her potential, not satisfied, but not complaining.  She is single and relatively content to be.  She is helping her parents through a cancer battle, her brother through a divorce, and maybe some others too.  She is passionate about health care injustice.  She is merciful and compassionate.  She cries when things are not going as they should. She wears her emotions. She likes to have fun. She is devoted to her family and friends.  She loves her nephew and niece. She likes to relax.  She doesn't have much money.  She has no current job prospects,except in retail. Her car is dying, too.  Something about a bad transmission and second gear.  She is going to the beach anyways.
Kira is also faithful. At 22 this is not a small matter. I've known her since she was a teenager in Lutheran confirmation. She wants her life to be meaningful, to do a big thing.   She wants to make a difference and suspects that she may not have to wander too far to do so.  She is searching for work that will provide a sufficient livelihood, so that she can pursue what she loves. I say if you can do what you love, what you are passionate about, and get paid for it, you are truly living.  Her days are fairly ordinary, but drenched with potential.  She anticipates and waits, with patience.  Not in a hurry.  Kira is being called by God to live a life devoted to service.  She will see and hear and do extraordinary things, because God does extraordinary things in and through the ordinary lives of people like Kira. God is beginning a work in her life that God will be faithful to complete, over time, in subtle and not so subtle ways. She is both ready and completely unprepared and that is thrilling ad scary and the way things are when you're 22 and fresh out of college, without work, living at home.
Ordinary time.  With family, at the beach, in the mall, in the clunker on the road, on the couch or the computer.  God breaks in and seizes us with a hopeful vision of life eternal.  Inspired, we wake up and drink coffee and do what the day calls us to do.  Everyday, the ordinary and the extraordinary, the sacred and the mundane, collide.  Look around you.  Pretty ordinary, right? That is precisely where God is miraculously at work, making all things new.

Pentecost

of ONE being

This is from the band, "Lost and Found."  A bit of tribal humor, I guess.  I posted this on Facebook and my uncle thought it was too full of Lutheran pride, self-promoting.  To which I responded, Kris Kristofferson and Loni Anderson?  

Anyway, the most important Lutheran of all is you.  I can prove it.  First, God made you.  Then, in Holy Baptism God adopts you as one of His beloved children.  Jesus, the son, died for you as a sign of God’s love for you.  That same Jesus was raised from the dead as a sign of hope for our future life with God the Father.  We will not be orphans, but redeemed and blessed members of God’s royal family.  Jesus has made a place in heaven for you and promises that he will come to take you to be with him.  Jesus also promises that the Holy Spirit will come upon you and lead you into the truth, giving you courage and the ability to live a God-centered life in this world.  This Spirit will intervene on your behalf in time of trouble and will protect you in time of need.  This same Spirit will inspire and empower you to faithfulness in your daily life.  The Spirit, however, brings each of us into communion with Jesus Christ in and through the church—the company of believers on earth charged with the ministry of Christ and armed with the Word of God and prayer.  As church each of us fulfills our particular calling to be God’s ambassadors and servants in the world.   This is how our church works: As a congregation, Zion Akron collected toothbrushes.  I presented 60 of them to our conference dean and he brought them to the synod assembly.  This congregation is part of the North Lancaster conference, of which there are 18 congregations. Our conference contributed 300 toothbrushes to the synod assembly.  Our synod consists of 257 congregations.  We meet annually in assembly.  Each congregation contributed to their conference, which contributed to the synod.  We made over 800 health kits for Lutheran World relief.  Lutheran World relief is our global extension working in 19 countries: Bolivia, Burkina faso, Colombia, El Salvdor,Haiti, Honduras, India, Indonesia, Kenya, Mali, Nepal, Nicaragua, Niger, Peru, Philippines,Sri Lanka, Sudan, Tanzania, Uganda.  These personal care kits provide a toothbrush, soap, a comb, nail clippers, and a towel. 

spiritual deathcrawl

This is from the movie “Facing the Giants”, about an underdog team and a coach nobody believes in.  But this scene is about the Christian life.  Because we are all doing a death crawl.  We are all carrying burdens on our backs.  We are all blindly pushing forward, not knowing how far we must go or when we will reach the end.  We all experience pain and exhaustion and the threat of utter failure and defeat.  We are all prone to self-doubt and a need to give up the fight, to let the giants overwhelm us.  My aunt, married to my mom’s oldest brother is 54.  She just had major surgery and has been diagnosed with ovarian cancer that has progressed and spread.  What was abdominal pain is now cancer. I can’t imagine what is going through my Aunt’s and Uncle’s and cousins’ heads this weekend.  Fear.  Grief.  Worry.  Anger.  I have seen it.  Sometimes ministry feels like a war zone, simply going through life with others in all of their ups and downs. 

all the hope without the rapture

So, either the rapture didn’t happen or we’re in trouble. I’m not surprised either way. Never thought the Lutherans had much of a chance. Rapture was only going to happen for the fundagelicals and Pentecostals. They have bigger churches and more money than we do, so they must be doing something right, right? Enough about them. What about us? To be perfectly clear, I am a complete skeptic about end time predictions. Not because I don’t believe the biblical worldview on such matters. I believe there is a beginning, a middle, and an end to God’s story. I also believe that we are closer to the end than to the beginning. I believe that because the first Christians believed that the death and resurrection of Jesus was the sign of the end of the ages. They believed that a new age was dawning, in which God’s reign of justice and perfect peace was coming upon all people. But there has been an unexpected delay in its coming. And so they had to adjust their thinking about the end of days. It’s the delay, coupled with the promise of the end and the reality of death that causes people to make false predictions.

questions and answers

In the Sunday paper last week, there was a comic strip.  (The comic strips are still the best part of the Sunday paper.) The strip was simple. On one side of the strip was a middle aged man sitting behind a desk.  On the front of the desk was a sign that read, "QUESTIONS ANSWERED".  On the other side of the strip was a younger man, a twenty-something fella sitting behind a desk.  On the front of his desk was a sign that read, "ANSWERS QUESTIONED".  These are the signs of our times.  Generational, cultural, philosophical change has produced this sort of paradox in thought.  There are people who believe in the answers.  They believe that life's big questions have been answered sufficiently: by science, religion, the B-I-B-L-E, some other dogmatic system or text.  Some of them may think that they have the answers to give; in a book, a sermon, a speech, a half-hour infomercial.  They believe that the Truth is knowable and that it has all been given. Others are not so sure.

Burnout

New York Times (Aug. 2010): 1,500 pastors leave their ministries each month due to burnout, conflict, or moral failure. 90% work more than 50 hours a week. 75% report severe stress causing anguish, worry, bewilderment, anger, depression, fear, and alienation. 70% do not have any close friends.80% say they have insufficient time with their spouse. 50% feel unable to meet the demands of the job.

Just read this article of statistics. This June is my 10th anniversary of ordained ministry. I've only wanted to quit weekly for about the last 9 years. "Should have stayed on the farm, should have listened to my old man", said Elton John.  I've thought it, too.  I've imagined other lives: other careers, other vocations, lottery jackpot winnings.Why?  Because ministry can be lonely. You can feel like you're not entertaining enough, not smart enough,not interesting enough. Unattractive, uninspiring.  You can feel unprepared, foolish, and unnecessary. When your work deals with other people's faith in God and their ability to live healthy spiritual lives, you can feel inadequate. Ministry is no ego trip. It wrecks havoc on your self-esteem, especially if that's at all tied to the approval of others. I have seen more people leave church on account of me than I have seen people come to church because of me. I have been told many times how wonderful some other pastor is.He's such a kind man or a good preacher, etc...When people ask me about the church or ministry, I struggle to know what to say. The congregation I serve is not growing.  People are dying here.  In 6 years there are half as many people here. There are fewer young, faithful  families here. Fewer older adults, fewer young children.We don't have inspiring contemporary worship or special programs for people of all ages.  We don't go on awesome mission trips.  We don't have the best VBS in North Lancaster county.  We don't have a large, dynamic staff.   So what do I say?  "Yeah, on paper I'm a big fat statistical failure.But at least I still have a job." There have been times when the way I have been treated has made me wonder why I spent so much time and money in education/training. I live everyday knowing that some people, who used to be faithful Christians here, hate me. I judge myself in these matters and wish there could be reconciliation and peace.  But they do not want peace with me.  They want me to go away.  I've wondered if I woud endure and outlast them or not. Ministry includes personal vulnerability and loss. Ive lost some things and a few people along the way.   

After all this I have to say something else:  I have been given many gifts in ordained ministry too. I have walked with families in joy, in sorrow, in worry and strife, in fear, in poverty and want, and in times of abundant blessing. I have comforted the dying and prayed with the living.  I have fed people and given people hope.  I have met some interesting characters and seen some amazing things. I have seen healing.  I have seen people come to believe in God, follow Jesus, become part of His church.  I have enjoyed opportunities to learn. I have made music for kids.  I have told stories that made people laugh and cry.  I have spent time in silence.  I have observed the church's year, enjoying the seasons of the Christian life. I have planted things. I have done these things in community,with others. I have been part of something bigger than myself.  I have had help.  God's grace, my wife's love, and my kid's joy keep me moving.

Finally, to keep a perspective is to realize that I am not at the center of it all.  The story of my life is not the main event or the most important thing.  I may burnout or fade away or something else.  But life will go on.  Because God is love and love is patient. Love endures all things, bears all things, hopes all things, believes all things. Love never ends. 

Love never ends.  

So to my colleagues out there, flaming out this week:  Thanks for your service, your devotion to the Christian life, and your endurance.  Its a marathon, not a sprint.  St. Paul wrote, "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith."  Go and do likewise. Everyday.  

triumph over evil, victory over death, and the road to emmaus

I know what you all are thinking.  Some coincidence, huh?  My wife and I go away for a few days, and while we’re gone, Osama Bin Laden is found and executed.  So, to clear the air, neither Cherie nor I are members of an elite Navy SEALS team.  We were in the Adirondacks reading books and taking naps.  Some week though. From presidential birth certificates and royal weddings to the confirmed death of the most notorious man on earth. Closer to home, our brother Wayne succumbed to his four year battle with cancer.  He died fully aware, ready, and at peace.  He said goodbye to the people he loves.  On Tuesday, we will gather here for worship, to give thanks to God for Wayne’s life and to receive comfort in sorrow.  Next Sunday, we will celebrate holy baptism; welcoming new children, new life, to this congregation.  There is joy and there is sorrow.  It may seem like a circle, a perpetual pattern, a never-ending life cycle.  It may seem like biology is the one true fact of life.  We are born, we live, we die.  An old Blood, Sweat, and Tears song from the 60’s said, and when I die and when I’m gone, there’ll be one child born in this world to carry on, carry one.  But is that enough for us? Is that it? The circle of life?   It never has been.  Jews and then Christians have always questioned this seeming unending cycle, the seasons of life.  The biblical worldview rejects the circle of life.  We see the history of the world as an unfolding story, with a beginning, a middle, and an end.  We do not see it as a perpetual machine, from birth to death and back again.  We cannot accept death, or evil and injustice as natural parts of the created order.  We cannot believe that the living God, who breathes life into all things, is responsible for sin, disease, and violence leading to death.  What do Christians believe about evil, about death?  In light of the death of Osama Bin Laden, what do we say?  Or perhaps more importantly, in light of the resurrection of Jesus, what is our hope?

the Resurrection of Jesus and the Goodness of God's Creation

Alleluia Christ is risen! He is risen indeed alleluia! 

But before he was raised, Jesus died.  He died just as he told them he would.  He went to Jerusalem at Passover and became victim to the religious and the romans, hell bent on crushing rebellions and dreams.  They had to stop him from becoming bigger than he was, a mere Galilean peasant with grandiose ideas and a following of naïve and needy souls.  He told them it was going to be that way, that it must be that way.  He told them that he would die and in three days rise again.  They hadn’t believed him though.  They had chosen not to believe it because they loved him, they needed him, they expected more than death from him.  Accepting mortality and death is hard for any of us.  We hate death and how it robs us of ourselves, our loved ones.  Besides, they expected that he was the one to set right what was wrong with the world.  They believed that he could change the world, heal the wounds, reconcile the wrongs, fix the broken.  Usually putting that much hope in a single human being is a bad idea, never ends well.  But they believed that he had the power to change everything, if he stayed alive and accepted his role as the anointed King.   They believed that he was messiah, a holy king sent by God himself to restore the kingdom of Israel, to abolish the powers that threatened daily existence, to release prisoners, heal the sick, give hope to the dying.  They had reason to believe in him; he was healing and teaching with power and authority and what he said and did was Good, very good.  His goodness seemed to include all kinds of people; jews, pagans, men, women, children, ethnic minorities practicing other forms of Judaism, soldiers, tax collectors working for the roman empire, prostitutes, lawyers, the wealthy and the poor.  Everyone was invited, but few were willing to accept. No one wanted to be with those people. What he offered was life for the ages, but not without cost.  Discipleship was about serving others, giving freely and generously, accepting the other, loving the enemy.  Following his path might mean to reject one’s own family.  Putting God’s mission first.  Putting my wants and needs last.  He called fishermen and zealots and tax collectors and not-so-trustworthy followers.  And he entrusted them with his work of healing and forgiveness. He said, only in becoming the last, the least, and the loser does one get into God’s kingdom. For those who did believe this, the last thing they needed was a dead rabbi.

it was good

Where do we see power?  Governments?  Armed forces?  Wealth? Sheer numbers of people?  In the mind of the individual?   

St Patricks cathedral in New York is directly across from Rockefeller center and at the entrance to Rockefeller center is the great sculpture of Atlas holding up the world. ON Good Friday, the doors of the cathedral are opened, and you can see the great cross from the street.  Turn in one direction and there is the mythical atlas holding up the world, turn in the other, and there is the one broken by the world.  Which image speaks the truth?  Is the world upheld by our godlike strength or by the crucified love of God?  Upon that decision everything, simply everything must turn.” Father Richard Neuhaus, Death on a Friday afternoon.

palms. both leaves and hands.

On Palm Sunday we hear two stories about Jesus. Both involve Palms.  Palm branches strewn in his path and the palms of Jesus’ hands, nailed to a cross.  Two different palms with two different meanings.  

The first of these stories is the story of Jesus triumphal entry into the capital city of Jerusalem for the festival of Passover.  Jesus enters on a donkey with crowds shouting blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord, Hosanna to the son of David.  Jews awaited a Messiah to liberate them from foreign rule and establish true worship of their God Yahweh.  Their God was a deliverer who had delivered them from the Egyptian Pharaoh and from Babylon.  The history of their God Yahweh was that of redemption and freedom from oppressive foreign rule.  What God had done before, God would do again according to God’s covenant promises to Israel.  God would send an anointed King with God’s power.  This King would rule forever and would usher in an age of peace.  Passover, the Jewish memorial celebration of the Exile from Egypt represented the hopes of the Jews.  Passover inspired people to take up the cry for justice and the hope for Messiah to come.  Passover was revolution time and often led to violence and Roman crackdown to quell it.  Already before Jesus of Nazareth one such Messiah had been killed by the Romans.